By / 1st June, 2015 / Funny t shirt, T-Shirts / No Comments

Another text conversations with Dave and Dave: Vampire chicks verses werewolf chicks

Another day, another surreal conversation with my best friend who happens to also be named Dave.  Before I get blasted for being sexist let me say that this is how dudes talk.  Ladies, any guy who denies this is a flat out liar.

Dave C: Would you rather date a vampire or werewolf chick?

Dave I: Werewolf.  Turns into a beast once a month?  How is that different from a regular chick?  (Note: I can sense the hate emails being written as I write this)

DC: I think she would have two cycles a month.

DI: Oh.  Vampire then.  Sucks your lifeblood?  How is that different from a regular chick?

DC: Vampires are usually loaded and I’d rather have to pay blood instead of cash and maybe she would let me crash in her castle.  I prefer well groomed.

DI: You know once in a while I get kind of attracted to a cute hairy hippy chick.

DC: Yeah as long as they don’t smell too bad but I can’t deal with unshaven pits.  I get sick at the smell of patchouli too.

DI: That’s the problem with dating a vampire.  I love eating garlic.

DC: Any girl will find something they hate about you anyway.

DI: Yeah.  The werewolf would probably not want to kiss you because of your silver fillings.

DI: Would dating a vampire chick count as necrophilia?

DC: .5.  Diet necrophilia.

Funny t shirtDI: Remember that blue bald chick from Farscape?  Would that be having sex with a plant?

DC: There’s nothing wrong with that.

DC: Girl who will: work with you, play Warhammer with you, or play video games with you?

DI: Video games.  Work with would get up your ass quick and there are no attractive women who play Warhammer.  Plus a lot of cute girls play video games.  Just look at Felicia Day.

DC: I love her.  I would ruin her life within a year.

DI: Also if she ever starts to bug you you could pray for a power outage.

DC: I never get tired of COOP gaming except for Destiny LOL.

DI: That game got old like from one day to the next.  Super hot chick who hates video games or an OK chick who loves them?

DC: OK is hot when you add a gaming headset.

DI: True.  On the other hand you can always sneak in video games on your iPad once in a while.  “I’m just reading the news honey.”

And I wonder why I’m still single.  The image I got from a funny t shirt in my personal collection.

the Infamous Dave Inman



Leave a Comment