A Guide to Nerd Guys Meeting and Dating Women: How to start talking to them Part 1

Last post I talked a little about the fact that there are women everywhere, and later on I will talk about specific places that I think  are particularly cool for this sort of thing.  However, if I send you out into the world without equipping you with the bare rudiments of how to open a conversation with them without coming across as a total creep either you will get maced or simply be so intimidated you won’t say anything to anyone.  So like a hunter headed out to catch a lion, we have to make sure you are equipped with the proper weapons to bag your game without losing any vital organs.

The first thing we should talk about is the massive fear of rejection most guys (not just  nerds, although as a sub group we seem to be more paralyzed by this) experience when contemplating talking to an attractive girl.  Let me say that this fear is well founded, as approaching a girl who is a total stranger in akin to crossing a mine field only to get kicked in the nuts on the other side.  How, then, do we deal with this?  The answer is get used to stepping on land mines and wear a cup.

By that I mean get used to rejection.  There are three things you need to do to be great at anything and they are practice, practice, practice.  I had a friend who helped me get over my inability to talk to and/or pick up women and the thing he did was told me to go out and get rejected.  Not joke.  We would go to a club or a bar and he would not give me back my car keys until I had been rejected by 25 different women.  He was Batman to my Robin.

(Robin t shirt from the comic book t shirts section).  Like Robin, eventually I learned enough and morphed into Nightwing, capable of fighting crime (or getting women) on my own, while my replacement got beat almost to death with a crowbar and blown up by the Joker.  However, the biggest part was getting rejected so much that I developed a callous over the part of my ego that gets injured by rejection.  Now I am more or less impervious to it.

Now that I think about it, I think this should be your first homework assignment.  Starting tonight and until you get a girlfriend your job is to talk to 10 different women each day.  You are not trying to pick them up, just get used to talking to them and not feeling bad when they blow you off.  And by different women I mean women you do not actually have a legitimate reason to talk to.  Coworkers, family member, friends, etc. do not count.  You must talk to them for whatever reason (even if it is to ask the time, but I would put a limit of one of those per day).  You can wait until tomorrow when I have posted some more guidelines, but if you are really motivated you will get out there tonight.

That’s it, as I kind of have a headache tonight.  I will post more tomorrow.

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