By / 31st October, 2014 / Cartoon T Shirt, T-Shirts / No Comments

Ouija Review Part 1

What’s better than a horror movie where lots of scary stuff happens?  How about a horror movie where no scary stuff happens?

This is a film that suffered from the Curse of the X-Files.  The problem the X-Files suffered from was every time you were 100% convinced you were about to see an alien, ghost, Bigfoot, or chupacabra only to have it turn out to be a cat or some damn thing.  X-Files was 85% set up, 14% misinterpretation of data, and 1% actual aliens.

That’s not to say it’s a bad formula.  The X-Files was wildly successful and that formula rocked for setting atmosphere and that is what this film also does.  If setting up creepy situations is your goal this film could be your YouTube instructional video.  The problem is when it actually came time for something to happen the creepy atmosphere stopped off at the Hum Drum Truck Stop and took a little snooze in the back seat of its car.

Cartoon T ShirtThe story is pretty much the love child of an episode of Supernatural mated with Scooby Doo (image courtesy of the cartoon t shirt category).  I have to admit serious disappointment in the level of creativity displayed here.  The story was every bad horror/ghost cliche done in a dead boring order.  Why not have the Ouija board be a key to a portal to the Lost City of R’Lyeh and the kids have to wander around trying to avoid Cthulu and his minions.  Of course at that point the movie would have been a rip off of Hellraiser II but honestly it would have been a lot more fun.  How about the Ouija board is connected to the ghost of a girl killed by a serial killer and she is trying to give them clues to who it is before he kills off half the local high school?  The police are desperate to find him but no one believes the kids except for one desperate cop out for revenge for his daughters death (in this case played by James Woods).  Either of these stories would have been better than the formulaic dross this film is comprised of and I just thought of them while sitting here at my desk.


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